Casting Shadows

I have to say: there is a certain delight to knowing people through astrology. It simply feels cool to be able to understand what a person is trying to say the first time they say it, or to note this thing or that thing about a person's character to nudge them towards greater self-awareness in a time when they are feeling a bit fuzzy about things. And it is, of course, ego-boosting to witness someone's fascination with him- or herself combine with their fascination towards a person who simply should not know what he (or she) knows. All and all, it tends to be a gratifying experience, most of the time.

But then there are the other times.

Many months ago (I am not sure when, exactly), I wrote a lengthy character analysis for a friend I had recently made. I had, along with some other aquaintances, met with her maybe half a dozen times, enough for her to find out I was an astrologer and get curious. So I did a natal chart analysis for her, and in the process learned to know her character in the personal kind of way that naturally happens with astrology.

Anyhow, this friend was romantically involved with what I thought was a rather unpleasant individual, though I suppose he had his good qualities. Eventually, their relationship turned sour. I would get periodic updates on how things were going from her, as well as from our mutual friends. But having noted both her character and the events that surrounded her, I could see heartbreak manifesting even from my admittedly distant stance, well before after she withdrew from her social circles and interests (at his behest).

Everyone knew things were not going that well, but people remain hesitantly hopeful, and of course they would wish only the best for her. I wished the best for her, too, but I could tell this was not the best. More than simple intuition, I could see the downward spiral.

Recently, there was an update. Shortly thereafter I re-read the analysis I wrote for her, it seems downright prescient now. From how she began to what she did during, to her specific method of calling it quits, I could have been predicting the future - which is something I don't do. But with natal charts, once placed in context it sounds a lot like prediction. Not because of any true and actual foreknowledge of events, but because the underlying details of the personality are there whether the context is a bad relationship, a jaunt through Europe, a new job, or whatever.

The problem I have is having to watch it occur, knowing what comes next each time an event takes place, and recognizing that any interference would be unwelcome, improper, and ineffectual. All three of those things combined help reinforce my general policy of "non-directive analysis". Which is to say: illuminate, but do not advise (at least, not without being asked to do so). Even if not for that, I have a close friend who decided to tell me: "...you have to be careful, you have to watch what you say to [her]..." This friend knows that people whose natal charts I have done tend to take me very seriously thereafter. So I watched all this occur, mutely, feeling more depressed about the situation with each passing update, all of them verifications of the kind of entropy I had already predicted in my own mind. Although, I suppose it would technically be considered educated guessing (how exactly do you cross over that line between knowing and guessing anyways when it comes to the unformatted future?).

Whatever the case, I noticed that I had already written the storyline in that analysis...just without naming persons, places, and things. But there's something even more debilitating to the spirit about being aware of it all along...wanting to help, knowing the what and the why and the wherefore, but to be unable to provide meaningful assistance even as you watch a personal tragedy unfold. While this can occur to anyone and is certainly not limited to astrological awareness, I find it stings more than intuition or experience because of the logical certainty involved.

This is not the first time something like this has happened to me. It is thankfully rare, but knowing people via natal astrology is just not always a pleasant experience, especially when you have good cause to be concerned about their welfare. Or your own, because it has come into play for my life at least once.

That's all for now.


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